The Refiner’s Fire

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The Refiner's Fire is a poetry collection about God's faithfulness in the midst of extreme pain. Written by an up and coming young author with autism, it powerfully communicates the hard emotions of real life, touching on themes of faith, anxiety, bullying and mental illness.

I've heard it said that God is the Potter

and that I am the clay,

that the agony I feel all throughout

is merely Him shaping me.

But I don't see the shaping.

I don't see how this could be turning me into

the woman He destined eons before the creation of time.

I've been told I'm admirable

for not letting my struggles

break me down,

but those who say that are blind to the cracks;

they don't see that all I'm doing is surviving.

Abba, I don't like this.

It feels like I'm being set on fire,

like I'm being diminished to ashes.

How can You be refining me

if all You're doing is breaking me?

• The Refiner's Fire