'Calamity by name, calamity by nature' is how most adults see Calamity Jones. Calamity sees herself as a brilliant problem solver, even if nearly everything she touches turns to disaster.

One morning, her family wake to find their pink plastic lawn flamingo, Fred, has been birdnapped. His cranky girlfriend, Mildred the cat, won't stop meowling a horrid combination of meowing and howling so Calamity comes up with a crazy plan to find Fred. Along the way, Calamity Jones gets grounded twice (this will happen when you involve the police and attempt to borrow a real life flamingo from the local zoo).

Finally on a last minute Christmas Eve shopping trip, Calamity sees a tv news crew and tells them the whole Fred and Mildred saga, in hopes it will flush out the flamingo thieves. On Christmas morning, her family wake to find Fred back on the front lawn with a happy cat by his side, a mysterious travel photo tied around his neck and 50 other pink plastic flamingos!