If you keep repeating behaviors that you know are not good for you…if you talk endlessly about your problems but never make a serious move to change them… you could be a shit shoveler. Laments like these are suggestive of the problem:
And then he cheated on me again, and I know he’s not good for me, but I love him/can’t leave him/ maybe this time….
I hate my job but I can’t leave now…
It doesn’t matter what diet I’m on, I gain it all back, and more. He’s thirty and not going to school or working. I told him he had to move out, but he won’t leave and I can’t kick him out. Anyone stuck in a rut (in relationships/ work/ home/ or within) and wanting to get on with his or her life, might want to read Stop Your Sh*t Shoveling by internationally recognized psychiatrist Dr.Carl Hammerschlag, whose work with Native Americans has been summarized in three critically acclaimed books (The Dancing Healers, The Theft of the Spirit, and Healing Ceremonies), which describe his transformational journey from doctor to healer. In this book, Hammerschlag gets up in your face and challenges you to decide to stop your self-destructive habits. In the language of science and story this wise elder makes it clear that it doesn’t matter how long you’ve been repeating those dysfunctional behaviors, it’s always possible to make changes. The keys to change are a burning desire to want to, the belief that you can do it, and learning how to give your brain new instructions. Hammerschlag tells compelling stories from both his own life and those of his patient’s, about how to create detours on the brain highway of old habits. When buttons get pushed that almost reflexively, trap you into repeating old self-destructive habits, you can actually create new pathways to get yourself out of the rut. Stop Your Sh*t Shoveling is a must read if you want to let go of behaviors that no longer serve you.
