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This book was written to help others and to show there is a light at the end of a long, dark tunnel. There was little information when I desperately needed help. I decided to tell my story, so victims and their loved ones need to know they are not alone. It is imperative they get help soon. If this is not possible, it can be beneficial just being encouraged to talk to someone in a safe environment. Child sexual abuse affects the lives of the victims. It also breaks families up. Lies and deceit can manipulate the system. On reflection, it was better to turn a negative into a positive, this was not always achievable when that person was in a bad place. Family, friends etc., find it hard to believe and the stigma of mental health is always there.
My life has evolved around looking after my two children. My world was turned upside down the day our two adult daughters disclosed child sexual abuse. Fortunately, I was able to support them when the trauma was buried deep in their subconscious and their behavior presented itself in an irrational manner ie: self-harm, suicidal thoughts and I endlessly witnessed horrific, psychotic flashbacks.
Parents/guardians need to read 'Justified Anger' to understand how the closest person could also be the perpetrator. A child's feelings and emotions need to be heard, allow them to feel safe to divulge their deepest secret.
I tried many times to complete my career. Thoroughly enjoyed being a nursing assistant, it was such a rewarding job, especially on the mental health wards.
Years later, I am happy with my dogs and my two ponies and a rescued donkey. I am close to a wonderful livery yard and have made many friends. Eating out at a different cuisine is one of my pleasures.
