In September, when the school principal promises to kiss a pig if the students read 10,000 books, a girl volunteers Hamlet, her unwilling, Shakespeare-quoting pet pig. But poor Hamlet wants nothing to do with such foolishness. To kiss, or not to kiss, /The principal in school?/Why choose a pig/To be their fool? By the end of April the kids still have a long way to go, and it looks as if Hamlet is safe. But after an author comes to visit and the school has a book fair, the students quickly reach their goal. The date is set for the big kiss. Hamlet is miserable. But he tells himself, A pig to himself must be true/In spite of plans that humans brew. Will the principal follow through on her promise?