(mis)TRUST

My mum’s words always echo in my mind… You can never trust a man with your heart. Men don’t know what to do with a heart that’s been given to them- so they break it. But what happens to the woman who trusts with her heart after he breaks it? I know, she fractures and shatters. Knowing the definitions of the words that have defined me, this is my understanding. Trust- To give oneself over to believing in a person or situation. Distrust- The inability to trust or believe in a person or situation. Mistrust- To be suspicious of a person or situation because you have no confidence in them. The words themselves are simple, yet the definition of mistrust is not. There is an element of grey and undefinable to mistrusting. And sadly, its this grey undefinable that has hurt me most in life. I wanted to trust, but I just couldn’t do it anymore. Then I met him. And he became my black and my white. He became the beautiful exception to everything I had ever known before him.