The Business Secrets of Drug Dealing tells the story of a hyper-observant, politically-minded, but humorously pragmatic weed dealer who has spent a working life compiling rules for how to a) make money and b) avoid prison.

Each rule shapes a chapter of this fast-paced outlaw tale, all delivered in Huey Carmichael’s deliciously trenchant argot.

Here are a few of them:

No guns but keep shooters. Stay behind the white guy. Don’t snitch. Always have a job. Be multi-sourced. Get your money and get out.

Part edge-of-the-seat suspense story, part how-to manual in the tradition of The Anarchist Cookbook, The Business Secrets of Drug Dealing is as scintillating as it is subversive. Just reading it feels illegal.