Discover the keys to upholding your vows while staying sanein this hilariously candid guide to relationships, from the husband-and-wife team of comedian Kevin Fredericks and influencer Melissa Fredericks

Growing up in the church,Kevin and Melissa Frederickswere taught endless rulesaround dating, sex, andmarriage, but not a lot about what actually makes a relationship work.When theyfirstgot married, they felt alone-like every other couple had perfect chemistry while the two of themstruggled. There were conversations that they didn’t know they needed to have, deep-rooted fears that affected how they related to each other, and seasons ofchange thatput theirmarriageto the test.

Part of their story reads like a Christian fairytale- high school sweethearts, married in college, never sowed any wild oats,with two sons and a thrivingmarriage. Butthere'sanother side of their story- the night Melissa kicked Kevin out of her car after years of communication problems, the time early in theirmarriage when Kevin bordered on an emotional affair, or the way they’ve used social media and podcasts to conduct an honest, no-holds-barred conversation about forbidden topics like jealousy, divorce, and how tobeChristian and sex-positive. (Because, as Kevin writes, Your hormones don’t care about yourbeliefs. Your hormones want you to subscribeto OnlyFans. )

In MarriageBeHard, they gobeyond the rules preached on Sunday mornings and the advice given at men’s and women’s groups, providing a hilarious and fresh masterclass on what it takes to build and maintain a lasting relationship. Drawing on interviews with experts and nearly two decades ofmarriage, they argue that-

. Compatibility is overrated. . Communication is about way more than simply talking. . Seeing divorce as an option can actually help yourmarriage. . There’s such a thing as healthy jealousy.

Realmarriageis not automatic. Itain’t noTesla on the open road.Sometimes it’s a stick shift on a hill in the rain with no windshield wipers. Butif you get comfortable visiting-and revisiting-the topics that matter, it can transform your bond with your partner and the life you’re building together.